THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE BUT THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:
>************************
>Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss.
>But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.
>************************
>I thought that I could love no other.
>Until, that is, I met your brother.
>*************************
>Roses are red, violets are blue,
>sugar is sweet and so are you.
>But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
>the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.
>*************************
>
>Of loving beauty you float with grace.
>If only you could hide your face.
>
>***************************
>
>Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
>This describes everything you are not.
>
>***************************
>
>I want to feel your sweet embrace.
>But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
>
>****************************
>
>I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
>Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
>
>****************************
>
>My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
>Marrying you screwed up my life.
>
>***************************
>
>I see your face when I am dreaming.
>That's why I always wake up screaming.
>
>******************************
>
>My love, you take my breath away.
>What have you stepped in to smell this way?
>
>******************************
>
>My feelings for you no words can tell.
>Except for maybe "go to hell".
>
>*******************************
>
>What inspired this amorous rhyme?
>Two parts vodka, one part lime.
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