Steeve, it's brilliant! Tres drole (though some of them leave me scratching my head and wondering how/why some of them work).
More worrying, that I understand some and recognise a few more of them as being true from my visits to friends and their swiss families in Zurich and Neuchatel.
So funny, you've inspired me to dig out an old funny I kept from a Russian friend's site on Virtualtourist...
You know you've been in Russian too long when.....
1. You have to think twice about throwing away the empty instant coffee jar.
2. You carry a plastic shopping bag with you 'just in case'
3. You say he/she is 'on the meeting' (as opposed to the more proper 'at the' or 'in a' meeting).
4. You answer the phone by saying 'allo, allo, allo" before giving the caller a chance to respond.
5. You save table scraps for the cats living in the courtyard.
6. When crossing the street, you sprint.
7. In winter, you choose your route first by determining which iciles are least likely to impale you on the head.
8. You let the telphone ring at least 3-4 times before you pick it up because it is probably a miss-connection or electric fault.
9. You hear the radio say it is just at or below freezing outside and you think it might be a nice day for a change.
10. You argue with a taxi driver about a fare of 30 rubles to go 2-3 miles while it is snowing.
11.You actually know and care who won the last Spartak soccer match.
12. You win a shoving match with an old Babushka-grandmother for a place in line and you are proud of it (this one is particularly funny since my internet friend is a giant over 6'6'' tall)
13. You hesitate to put on our seat belt to avoid offending the taxi driver and the impending 5 minute conversation to explain why you are putting it on.
14. You are pleasantly surprised when there is actually toilet paper in the public toilet (this could be a good one for Australia too, seriously! After going to NZ and being amazed at their perfect facilities, wherever you go, even in the middle of nowhere finding paper, soap AND handtowel, here is never any good any more)
15. You look at people's shoes to determine where they are from.
16. You 'automatically' hand in your pepper spray at the door before going through the metal detector.
17. You are pleasantly surprised when there is actually wine in that bottle of Georgian Kinzamaruli.
18. You notice that Flathead's cell phone is smaller than yours and you're jealous.
19. Your day seems much brighter after seeing that Goon's Mercedes run into by a pensioner's 'Moskvich'
20. You are thrown off guard when the doorman at the nightclub is happy to see you (yeah, makes you wonder what's going to happen to you later if you enter)
21. You're not sure when the 'Gai' only asks you to pay the official fine.
22. You wonder what the tax inspector really wants when she says everything is in order.
23. You plan your vacation around those times of the year when they turn off the hot water.
24. You are relieved when the guy standing next to you on the bus actually uses tissues.
25. When you go mushroom and berry picking out of necessity, not recreation.
26. When you eat hot dogs for breakfast
27. When you begin to socialisze with your driver and/or your cleaning lady.
28. When you know what Dostoyevsky's favorite colour was.
29. When you move to Budapest and think you're in heaven.
30. When you start thinking of bread as a good mixer for vodka.
31. When you drink the brine from empty pickle jars
32. When you start shopping for products by their country of origin
33. When it doesn't seem strange to pay the GAI $2.25 for crossing the double line while making an illegal U turn and $35 for a microwaved dish of frozen vegetablesat a crappy restaurant.
34. When you know more than 60 Olgas
35. When you put the empty bottle of wine on the floor in a restaurant.
36. When your coffee cups routinely smell like vodka.
Kate